Active Aging: Heaping praise on women who make a difference

by Stacey Mason

March is Women’s History Month, so I thought I’d take this space to heap praise on women I’ve known forever and those I’ve recently met. Yes, this will focus on my experience. I’m hoping it encourages all of you to do the same!

Let me start with my maternal grandmother, Betty Edson. Grandma Betty was a tough cookie, having to leave school in sixth grade to care for siblings. Grandma returned to high school years later with her youngest daughter, and they graduated together. My Grandma Betty was also a widow at 33 when her husband died of cancer, leaving her to care for four children ages three to twelve. Grandma went to work in a factory where she met her second husband, my Papa. She always had a garden and fruit trees, canning and freezing it all to feed her family. Grandma also sewed all her family’s clothes and some of mine. Her last gifts to me were a crocheted bedspread and a wedding dress, both made when she was 80! I loved her and miss her very much.

My Mom, Nancy Silvas, was a unique character. All my life she worked as a bookkeeper, administrative assistant, and general office manager. My mom was not the warm, fuzzy type; it was the 70s and 80s after all. Mom was traditional in some ways and not so much in other ways. She cooked dinner nightly, making Sunday dinner extra special with dessert. She sewed me Barbie clothes, enrolled me in 8 years of tap dance, and taught me how to keep a house. My Mom also allowed us to drink at home, told me I had no curfew at 16, and let me date a man 11 years my senior, also when I was 16.

Now, you may be wondering: where is the praise. Well, the greatest gift my mom gave me was the ability to make my own mistakes and know she would always love me. Boy, did I do that! My Mom never once said, “I told you so.” The freedom Mom gave me led me to be more independent and assertive than she permitted herself to be. My Mom was a fantastic Grandma to my two kids. They would spend a week or two with her every year in Tennessee. The kids didn’t just hang out with Grandma. Oh no! She took them all over Chattanooga and Nashville tourist attractions, spoiling them the whole time. My Mom documented all our lives through pictures. When she passed in 2011, I picked up more than 20 photo albums from her home, going back to before my parents were married. They were an amazing gift. She was the keeper of our family history. I love her and miss her so much.

Now let me share about amazing women I’ve met over the years. I returned to work, after spending six years home with my kids, to work at a domestic violence shelter. My supervisor, Deb, encouraged me to go back to school. I had been thinking about it but was unsure, having come from a family that did not experience college. Deb told me I was more than capable and gave me the confidence to start.

During this period of my life, I also got divorced. I instantly became a stressed, single mom trying to make ends meet. Paying for daycare was nearly impossible. Along comes an angel. The wife of my kids’ cub scout leader, Sharon, became our sitter.  Sharon’s house was crazy compared to our tiny apartment. Sharon had four kids of her own, an exchange student, a foster child, a large dog, two horses, and two large parrots. My kids loved going to her house. Sharon watched my kids for almost nothing, fed them (and me) dinner, and became a crucial support to us. I’m not sure we would have been successful without her.

In October of 2000, I was hired at the American Red Cross as a case manager for the unhoused. I met a magical group of humans who were out to save the world! It was hard work, and we tackled it with grace, empathy, and humor. I met five women on that team who are my closest friends today. They’ve watched me finish college, raise my kids, get remarried, go through menopause (yikes!), experience my parents passing, and watch me become a grandmother. I would NEVER be where I am without their support. I hope you have women in your life who do the same.

Moving on, it’s time to heap praise on three amazing women I’ve met here, at the Stockbridge Area Senior Center. We have Elizabeth (Betti) Wetherell who has dedicated a ton of her time, energy, and money to our senior center for close to 20 years. (Betti is also featured as a “Woman of Note” in this month’s Stockbridge Community News.) Ms. Betti is our dining site coordinator, serving our lunches three days a week. She has raised three kids with her husband, Ed, and has six grandkids and one great-grandchild. Betti is a great example of how much one can contribute to one’s community later in life.

We also have Mary Schwark and Kathleen Mullins—two of our amazing volunteers. Ms. Mary checks everyone in at our senior center and helps with all big projects. Ms. Kathleen is our craft and volunteer coordinator. She does amazing things with a little paper and glue! These women have started these positions as a second act, after working and raising families. There’s always time to start something new!

A couple of younger women at the Senior Center also deserve high praise. Ms. Samantha Sanchez, who has served as the treasurer for the senior center, also interviewed me for my current position. Samantha has been serving at the township level and volunteering throughout the Stockbridge community. She is a great example for other young people on how to help your community. Ms. Alexa Ten Eyk is the president of our senior center board. She is an MSU business student and works at Eaton Bank. As SASC board president, Alexa manages various personalities and keeps us focused on our tasks. This is not an easy job!

I cannot imagine where I, or the Stockbridge Area Senior Center, would be without all the energy, time, and compassion given by all the women I’ve met. Take time daily to notice the women in your life who provide so very much.

Stacey Mason is the director of the Stockbridge Area Senior Center (SASC)—a great place to spend time. Visit stockbridgeareaseniors.org or call 517-480-0353 for information.

Take time daily to notice the women in your life who provide so very much. Image credit: Vonecia Carswell on unsplash.com