by Dr. Erin Clifton

We live in a world of constant change and hurrying, so we decided to slow down, take a breath, and dive deeper into something mentioned previously in this column. Think about how parenting advice and practices seem ever changing. Think about how you have evolved over the decades. Having a clear philosophy and understanding of your values can serve as a guide throughout your life, even through the changes. You can also apply these same principles to a parenting philosophy.

But what if you could dial it down to something even more foundational? Something that would help ensure consistency, alignment, and intention in the way that you raise your children? This is where a mission statement can come into play.

We live in a world of constant change with outside interference seeking to sow seeds of doubt in parenting inadequacy: Read this book! … Subscribe to this blog! … You’re feeding them wrong! … Your child needs this crib/stroller/toy/etc.! Put these all together, and the message we’re receiving is we are not intuitive enough on our own.

Having a mission statement can help keep you grounded and bring you back to your foundation. It’s a reminder of your intentions as a parent.

A mission statement is a written or verbal declaration of the values and principles you want to actively emit or participate in. When it comes to your parenting mission statement, it should reflect the values and guidance you want to project to your children. This is not about setting rules or goals. It’s about defining the essence of how you approach raising your children. This statement becomes the lens through which you filter your decisions. It’s how you choose to engage with your children and what kind of energy, behavior and influence you want to radiate into their lives.

When my boys were much younger, I decided to create a mission statement for those very purposes. Parenting is full of decisions, big and small, and it is easy to become overwhelmed with others’ opinions. Having a mission statement provides a consistent framework for navigating the doubts, along with the highs and lows. It’s through a mission statement that you get to decide what really matters.

Here’s what I came up with for my parenting mission statement:

​​I want my children to grow up into adults who have healthy, loving relationships. I want them to find something they’re good at, in which they can hone their skills and have successful careers. I want them to be contributing members to society, to be resilient and to know their own strength.   

Notice it doesn’t touch upon what clothes they choose to wear or the length of their hair. This is not about controlling every decision, but rather, it’s about providing an approach that will guide interactions and filter out what isn’t worth getting my jammies in a bunch over.

Activity Highlight: Here are some suggestions for you to start making your own unique parenting mission statement. Start with identifying your core values. Find a list of value ideas on the internet and keep narrowing down the ones you like most until you’re left with 3-4. Then ask yourself, “What are the most important things I want my children to experience and learn in life?” Reflect on your parenting goals. What kind of people do you want your children to become? Finally, keep it simple. A mission statement does not need to be very long or overly complex. If you start out wordy, keep editing until you are left with three to five sentences that communicate your mission.

Dr. Erin Clifton DC, CACCP, is a partner in Positively Chiropractic in Stockbridge, Michigan. Her specialty is pediatric, pregnancy and family health care. She is “mom” to two sons and two daughters and leads various health and wellness classes in the Stockbridge area. Dr. Erin has a personal passion for achieving optimal health, while educating and inspiring those in the community to work with the body, not against it.