Faces of Mental Wellness Part 3: Those who inspire, with a smile

by Tina Cole-Mullins & James Clark-Swalla

James Clark-Swalla
Freelance Photographer at DigitaCrumbs Photography and contributing writer Stockbridge Community Newspaper

Tina Cole-Mullins:
Freelance Journalist and contributing writer for Stockbridge Community Newspaper
and Community Outreach Facilitator for Wake Up Stockbridge & Surrounding Community

As we continue to explore the depths of mental health by highlighting “Faces of Mental Wellness” within our community, we had the opportunity to speak with Jennifer McClure and Jeff Boyer. Both are familiar faces to many in our area.

Boyer said that it’s not always easy to detect mental illness.

“We can easily see if we’re not healthy physically, we can see if we’ve gained some pounds or anything like that, but we can’t always tell if we’re not healthy mentally,” he said.

Sometimes we might just pass that off as having a bad day, Boyer said.

“But then if you have many bad days, and then it’s starting to affect you, and you don’t realize it because it happens slowly slowly over time, you don’t realize it has affected your job,” Boyer adds. “Mental health can be very powerful to us, if it’s not in good shape.”

Interview of Jennifer McClure by Tina Cole-Mullins

What is your experience with mental health?

Mental health challenges come from a variety of sources, and frequently unhealthy coping mechanisms (our attempts at self-soothing) compound the problem. For me, the path down instability originally was “birthed” from a season in my teenage years, in which I had significant back-to-back traumas and ungrieved losses. In June of 2014, I suffered a full-blown mental breakdown and really couldn’t function till mid-2018. During that time, I completely shut down. I lost my business, and many relationships.

Are you in or have you been in treatment?

I am not currently in treatment, though I have been off and on for many years. I’ve learned that depression can come from a variety of sources: chemical imbalance, spiritual reasons or situational. For me, it was a combination of all of the above.
• (Chemical): Depression and bipolar disorder run in our family, and we recently lost my little brother (way too young) to addictions that rose out of his self-medicating.

• (Situational): An event or season of events can initiate the path down mental illness. Unhealthy attempts at coping can accelerate the spiral, which causes further chemical imbalance. So, for me, I believe the chemical imbalance was already present, and situational triggers simply kicked them into high gear. Though for others, the order of how these happen may be different. The result is the same.
  (Spiritual): As a person of faith, I’ve always been taught to lean into my faith as a source of strength. Unfortunately, when in depression, the tendency to isolate can also make you disconnect from God, since relationships feel hard, even connecting with God.

What form of treatment works best for you?

I have briefly been on medication off and on, when I simply needed strength to “see the light of day” and put one foot in front of the other. My biggest breakthrough came from finding the right counselor, who said to me “You’re not crazy. Your response is perfectly appropriate to the stress in your home.” That one statement was like the light bulb going on, I had a whole new filter through which to view my situation. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I wasn’t wrong, bad, hopeless, helpless, or somehow “not enough.” This new clarity gives me the strength to start living differently, making one different, healthy choice at a time, which puts me on the path to wholeness and wellness.

What form(s) of self-care do you practice?

Essentially, once I decided to live, I realized I needed to make massive changes. I intentionally choose to do things that are healthy for my mind, spirit and body. Enough rest, healthy food, exercise, vitamins, positive podcasts, reading my Bible, other inspirational material, spending time with loved ones, writing, working my Mary Kay business, and keeping healthy boundaries with my time schedule. Most of all, I am hyper-vigilant about what I allow into my mind and environment. I know my triggers, when those thoughts come to my mind I consciously “capture” them and tell them they are not welcome. Like I used to tell our youth group kids, “That battle is already won. Do not engage.”

What does stability look like in your world?

At this point, I consider myself completely healed. It is nothing short of a miracle. I’ve been blessed to start over in my Mary Kay business successfully. I’m re-engaging with faith, family and community.
Having walked the journey I have, I feel a huge responsibility to let others know that recovery is possible. It’s hard work, but SO worth it! I’m writing and publishing my first book “Wisdom From the Wilderness”, which journals my recovery and lessons I learned along the way. It’s not a journey I would have chosen, but I lived it and now I just want to help others know two things: It’s OK to not be OK, but more importantly – you don’t have to stay there.

Boyer said there are ways to tell if you’re on your way to wellness.
“If you’re doing something that you love and you can feel it in your soul and your heart, (and) that you’re feeling welcomed by people who want you around…that can’t be just a distraction, that’s got to be something that’s helping you heal, because you’re working with your emotions,” he said.

“But if you’re doing something that’s helping you to change how you feel and knowing that you have that support system of those activities you do maybe that’s not just coping,” he adds. “It’s maybe a better coping mechanism in order to get to a better place.”

Boyer said that mental wellness can be a slow process.

“It’s really important to understand that it’s a slow process,” he said. “It could take years, but never give up and always know that when you wake up the next day, it can be a better day. Just have to get to the next day, always think that.”

Photo provided by Jennifer McClure, business owner, author, wife,
mother, glam-ma, joy-bringer & most important a child of God.

Authors’ Note: More of James Clark-Swalla’s interview with Jeff Boyer will be

Photo provided by Jeff Boyer, Teacher & Magician

included next month as part of our ongoing series.

Finding help
If you feel you need help, please contact:

• National Institute of Mental Health, 866-615-6464 or visit nimh.nih.gov.
• Mental Health America, 800-969-6642 or mhanational.org/.
• Michigan Medicine Depression Center, to make an appointment: 800-525-5188 or 734-764-0231 or depressioncenter.org/.
• St. Joseph Mercy Chelsea Outpatient Behavioral Health Services, 734-593-5250 or

stjoeshealth.org/location/st-joseph-mercy-chelsea-outpatient-behavioral-health-services.

• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, a 24-hour crisis line, 1-800-273-8255 or

suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.

• The Listening Ear in Lansing, a 24-hour crisis line, 517-337-1717, or theear.org/.
• Crisis Text Line: Text “Start” to 741-741.