Faces of Mental Wellness Part 2: Mother, daughter discuss their journeys
by Tina Cole-Mullins and James Clark-Swalla
There are many different faces to mental wellness. In our community, a few people have stepped up to join us in this difficult conversation and tell their stories. These people have experienced different forms of mental illness, a phrase that created its own stigma. The various diagnoses can include depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, bipolar and others.
In our series and exploration of finding stability, balance and well-being and the “Faces of Mental Wellness” within our community, we recently spoke with mother and daughter Shelley and Shaddai Wilson on their journey of mental wellness and the dynamics within their household.
Interview of Shelley Wilson by James Clark-Swalla
Shelley Wilson
Photo Credit: James Clark-Swalla
What were your hopes when you responded to our request for participation in this project?
I was excited to see an impulse to normalize talking about mental wellness. I thought you two were courageous and wanted to support your work in service to this community.
Do you openly talk about mental health with your family and friends?
I do. I have learned, personally and professionally, that moving in and out of mental wellness (as internal and external stressors fluctuate) is a normal part of being human. We have worked hard to shift the culture in our home from one of avoiding issues, to one of courageously addressing them. Remembering that we are on the same “team” and ultimately want each other to succeed in becoming the best possible version of themselves. This can be an awkward and messy process and sometimes requires outside help.
What currently supports your mental wellness?
Family/friends and the sanctuary of home supports my wellness. Within the safety of that support, getting enough sleep, eating well and the mindful movement of my body, thoughts, feelings and actions, in a healthy direction, all help me maintain myself. Some days I’m more successful than others.
How do you know when it’s time to reach out for help?
That is going to be different for every individual. A general rule might be something like: when my thoughts, emotions or behaviors are negatively impacting my own functioning or the functioning of those around me, then it might be time to seek additional support.
Interview of Shaddai Wilson by Tina Cole-Mullins
Shaddai Wilson
Photo Credit: James Clark-Swalla
How old were you when you were first diagnosed with a psychiatric illness?
I was 14 years old when I was first diagnosed.
Have you ever been hospitalized for your condition?
I have not been hospitalized but there were a couple of times when it came close to that.
Have you ever had suicidal ideations or attempts?
I have had suicidal ideations since I was 13 years old. I have attempted on two different occasions.
Are you currently in treatment and/or on medication?
I am both in therapy and taking medication currently.
What is stability in your world and what does it mean to you?
In my ideal world, stability is staying in one place for more than a month. Stability is sleeping in my bed most nights rather than a new one each week. Stability is feeling a sense of belonging. Stability is feeling comfortable in my own mind and body. My life has been very stable in that I have never wanted for anything, I have had a loving family who supports me in everything I do, and yet my life has also been very unstable inside my own little world.
It means the world to me that my family has provided a safe place for me to feel unstable. I haven’t felt truly mentally stable for so long that I can’t say what that looks like for me. I have had days in which I feel more stable than I have in a long time, those days are amazing, I can get myself out of bed before noon on those days, I eat well and I feel productive, sometimes that lasts for a couple of days, sometimes it only lasts for a few hours.
••••
Everyone struggles with mental illness, but it’s a matter of acknowledging and addressing that there is mental wellness within mental illness.
Life can be so much better if we had more compassion for one another – visibility is important, stories are important. Help one another. Reach out and genuinely ask people, “How are you doing?”
Authors’ Note: Next month, two familiar faces and active members within our community will share their stories. They will showcase what mental wellness looks like within their world.
Tina Cole-Mullins:
Freelance Journalist and contributing writer for Stockbridge Community Newspaper
and Community Outreach Facilitator for Wake Up Stockbridge & Surrounding Community
James Clark-Swalla
Freelance Photographer at DigitaCrumbs Photography and contributing writer Stockbridge Community Newspaper
Finding help
If you feel you may need help, please contact:
- National Institute of Mental Health, 866-615-6464 or nimh.nih.gov.
- Mental Health America, 800-969-6642 or https://mhanational.org/.
- Michigan Medicine Depression Center, to make an appointment: 800-525-5188 or 734-764-0231 or depressioncenter.org/.
- St. Joseph Mercy Chelsea Outpatient Behavioral Health Services, 734-593-5250 or stjoeshealth.org/location/st-joseph-mercy-chelsea-outpatient-behavioral-health-services.
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, a 24-hour crisis line, 1-800-273-8255 or
suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.
- The Listening Ear in Lansing, a 24-hour crisis line, 517-337-1717, theear.org/.
- Crisis Text Line: Text “Start” to 741-741.
